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  He knew he had to tread carefully. Hers was a powerful family, and her father not an enemy he would make willingly. On the other hand, there was no denying what he now knew: she was his perfect mate. So surely, if he had gone into rut, she would have gone into estrus? It was known that Omegas in heat were just as powerless in the face of their desire as Alphas in rut. Risking a glance to his right, he saw her sitting rigidly, her curvy thighs crossed. If she was aroused, she was showing no sign of it.

  No matter. He would find out as soon as he got her alone in his apartment. For a moment, he considered cracking open the window. Some fresh air might help diffuse her scent and make it easier for him to think clearly. On the other hand, it would do the same for her and he wanted her as affected by him as possible.

  So instead he drove as fast as he dared, thankful when they entered the underground parking lot reserved for residents of the Hill.

  Clara remained silent in the elevator. Evander hadn’t missed the way she was pressing herself against the far wall, trying to put as much distance between them as possible.

  He breathed her in and admired the way her silky dress hugged her body. He’d always found her pretty—everyone did—but as she’d never displayed any interest in him, he’d never made a move, preferring instead to bed willing women who flirted with him openly.

  Now, with the rut kicking up his pulse and his senses heightened, he was looking at her with new eyes.

  The elevator dinged and the doors opened. Taking her hand, Evander led her to his apartment and unlocked the door.

  Once they were inside, he backed her up against the wall, trapping her within the cage of his arms. She was trembling but her expression remained defiant.

  Leaning down so their lips were almost touching, he inhaled deeply. “Are you in estrus?” he growled.

  She shook her head once, almost imperceptibly. He didn’t miss the pulse fluttering in her neck.

  “Either you tell me the truth, or I will check for myself.”

  “I thought you wanted to talk.” Her voice was breathless.

  “We are talking. Answer my question.”

  “No, I’m not in estrus.”

  “You’re lying.” Unable to resist, Evander reached down and slid a hand up beneath the skirt of her dress. The flesh of her inner thighs was soft and warm, and he knew it even before he tugged aside the scrap of lace covering her sex. Her pussy was drenched in slick. As he found the hard little nub between her folds and stroked it with a fingertip, she let out a tortured gasp and gushed into his palm. “See?” he said matter-of-factly. “I knew you were lying.”

  Chapter Two

  Clara’s mind was racing but it was almost impossible to think with Evander’s fingers between her legs, his gentle stroking making her core throb and ache in a way she’d never known before.

  Fear, anger and lust were a heady cocktail, and the fact that he was so handsome was not making it easier for her to resist.

  “Please,” she whispered in a half-hearted attempt to get him to stop.

  In response, he leaned down and kissed her, his tongue slipping between her lips to find hers, his huge, hard body pinning her against the wall.

  Clara had been kissed before—one or two brief, meaningless exchanges when the flirting had gone too far at a social event. It had never felt like this and she had always been quick to regain the upper hand and prevent things from going further. This time, her entire body was electrified. Waves of pleasure started low in her belly and spread out until her fingertips and toes were tingling. Her entire focus narrowed down to one thing: Evander.

  He tasted faintly of red wine and something else she couldn’t identify, something she was suddenly hungry for. His scent was overwhelming, filling her every pore. She was vaguely aware of her fingers in his long, russet hair, the strands like heavy velvet against her palms.

  Slanting his head, he took the kiss deeper, his tongue possessing her mouth. He was no longer stroking her clit but his huge palm still cupped her aching, hot sex and Clara realized she was grinding herself against it, the slick she was producing only heightening the pleasure.

  The suppressants she had taken her entire adult life only prevented her from going into estrus, not from feeling desire, so she masturbated regularly and was no stranger to lust. But nothing had ever felt like this.

  Evander groaned against her mouth and the sound reverberated down through her core. She gasped, both aroused and ashamed by the rhythmic wet slocking sounds which filled the silence as she slid her drenched pussy up and down his hand.

  Her thighs were trembling and she knew that it was only he who was keeping her upright.

  When he removed his fingers from her sex, she let out a moan of frustration. There was a tearing sound and she realized he had ripped her panties clean off. But instead of replacing his palm against her aching, pulsating clit, he thrust her against the wall, forcing her legs apart, pressing his rock-hard erection against her belly.

  The expensive material of his slacks did nothing to conceal the size of his cock or his desire for her, and it was that which suddenly shocked her into awareness. “No,” she said against his mouth, her hands sliding to his shoulders and pushing him away.

  She might as well have been trying to move a brick wall.

  Panic began to rise within her, her heart fluttering in her chest like a caged bird. She tried again but she was trapped, with nowhere to escape.

  Evander broke the kiss and stared down at her, his blue eyes dark with hunger. As if from very far away, she heard him unzip his pants.

  “Please… let’s talk about this,” Clara tried again, but her words were drowned out by a low rumbling sound. The bitonal intonation made the hairs on the back of her neck rise, and every square inch of her skin broke out in goosebumps. Another spurt of arousal slid down the inside of her thigh, her clit pounding relentlessly.

  Evander was growling, and it was affecting her exactly as nature intended—making her desire skyrocket and her resistance melt like a snowball over a fire.

  The next moment, he was lifting her—still pressed against the wall—and she felt the swollen, blunt crown of his cock at the entrance to her slick pussy.

  His growling rose in volume until it became a roar and, with one, hard thrust, he penetrated her.

  Too late, Clara realized he had no idea she was still a virgin. Those rumors she had encouraged about her promiscuity must have reached him, too, and she cried out at the sharp, stabbing pain where before there had been such pleasure. He was so big, it felt like he was tearing her in half. Tears filled her eyes and she dug her nails into his back through his shirt, her legs dangling helplessly on either side of his narrow hips.

  Still growling, Evander paused for a moment, pinning her to the wall, still seated all the way inside her. Grateful for the reprieve, Clara took a deep breath and forced herself to relax, somehow aware that the more she tensed up, the more it would hurt.

  The searing burn deep in her pussy had faded a little and, knowing she had no choice left, that she was powerless to stop him—and he was probably equally unable to stop himself at this point—she tried to focus on his scent and his growl, two things she knew would help.

  Evander began to move slowly, stretching her, forcing her to accommodate his considerable girth. Despite the amount of slick she had already produced, the burning sensation was still there and Clara tilted her head forward to kiss him, desperate to turn the pain back into pleasure.

  As his tongue slipped between her lips, it mimicked the movements of his cock, possessing her completely—filling her so utterly, she wasn’t sure where she ended and he began.

  His growl reverberated through every cell of her body, the vibrations spreading right down to her dangling toes, and the sensation was concentrated at her core, making her clit hum.

  Clara ran her hands over his back, feeling the muscles bunch beneath the flimsy material of his shirt. Their shape and size reminded her of his physical ability to overpower her
and, for some reason, instead of inducing only fear, the thought excited her.

  Evander changed the angle of his hips slightly and Clara cried out, the sound muffled against his lips as his pubic bone met her stiff, swollen nub which had been so aching for more friction. He began to thrust harder, faster, and she relished the way every stroke lessened the pain and increased the pleasure.

  Nothing else existed but this man and what he was doing to her. It felt like a hunger she could never sate, a dream she never wanted to wake from. Her entire focus had narrowed to the apex of her thighs, where he was grinding his pelvis against her most sensitive spot, his skin satiny smooth beneath the coarse hair.

  She was gasping in time to his movements, the pleasure building and building, when there was a new burning, stretching feeling at her opening, and she realized with a jolt that his knot had formed, locking them together.

  Now, escape truly was impossible, at least until after he’d—

  Evander tore his mouth from hers and let out a fierce, animalistic roar. Driving his hips forward one more time, he stayed there, pinning her to the wall, his cock pulsating within her, filling her with a warm, dribbling sensation.

  Clara was still throbbing, aching for release, and she wasn’t sure if she was glad or disappointed he’d climaxed so soon. He shuddered against her several more times, his breath hot against her shoulder.

  “Fuck,” he said at length.

  There was a deep, residual ache in his groin. Evander had never knotted before, nor had he ever climaxed quite so hard. He felt drained but invigorated at the same time, the haze of lust lifting just enough that he realized how uncomfortable Clara must be, still pushed up against the wall, her feet dangling impotently above the ground.

  He lifted her easily and carried her to his bedroom. The knot had fused them together—for the next few moments, at least—but he figured they’d still be more comfortable on the bed.

  She didn’t resist, wrapping her legs around him like a child as he walked, then moving with him as he lay down on his back so as not to crush her.

  Clara rested on top of him, her breath coming out in little, faint puffs against his neck. Her heart was hammering against his chest. She was so tiny, so damn fragile. A typical Omega build. How had he never noticed before?

  He swallowed, suddenly unsure what to say. A million thoughts were crowding his mind but it was hard to think with her scent still making every part of him tingle.

  “How long before…” Clara’s voice was almost a whisper.

  “Before the knot shrinks?” he guessed her question.

  She nodded.

  “I don’t know. This is new to me, too. It beats regular sex, though, doesn’t it?”

  There was a long pause. Then, “I wouldn’t know.”

  There was a sudden roaring in Evander’s ears and for a moment, he wondered if he’d misheard. “What did you say?”

  She raised her head and met his gaze. Her exquisite face was curiously blank, her green eyes unreadable. “I said, I wouldn’t know. I was a virgin.” Her voice cut through him like a knife.

  “But…” Evander swallowed past a throat which felt like sandpaper and tried again. “But you’ve lived as an Alpha for all these years. I’ve heard all about your lovers. You’ve—”

  “All rumors, carefully maintained to keep up appearances,” she said icily. “And if you’d kept your promise to talk to me after we got in here, I would have told you that.”

  Guilt and shame made his own tone harsh. “If you hadn’t spent all these years pretended to be something you’re not, none of this would be an issue.”

  Forgetting herself, she tried to scramble off him, crying out when his knot prevented her from doing so. “Gods,” she raged, “I cannot believe you! What gave you the right to… to do that to me?” Slumping back down, she buried her face in his shirt.

  Evander forced himself to take a few calming breaths. He tried to place a comforting hand on her shoulder but she shook him off.

  “Don’t touch me.”

  “I’m so sorry,” he said at length, choosing his words carefully. Guilt, shame, anger and lust were all vying for the upper hand within him, but there was also another emotion. He couldn’t quite put a name to it, but it made him feel protective towards her and somehow desperate to make amends. “If I’d known it was your first time, I would have handled things differently. Very differently.” He closed his eyes against the sudden memory of the way he’d first entered her, mad with lust, ramming himself inside her in the assumption that she was as desperate for it as he. “It was never my intention to hurt you.” He sighed. “I won’t pretend to know what things feel like for you, but I’ve never been in rut before. Other Alphas warned me of its power, told me how this primal, base need takes over and eclipses everything else—including rational thought. But I never knew how true that was until it happened to me. And you were producing so much slick, I thought you felt the same way…”

  She stiffened at that, and he was quick to correct himself.

  “I was wrong, and I apologize. I did have every intention of talking to you when we first got home. I still want to talk.” The pressure in his knot had been abating steadily while he spoke, and he wriggled a little to confirm he’d softened enough. “I think you’ll find you can get off me now… if you still want to.”

  She was already raising herself off him before he’d even finished speaking. With a barely audible gasp, she extricated herself and slumped beside him in a defeated heap.

  The loss of her wet heat around him was acute, and he moved quickly to tuck himself back into his slacks, figuring they needed a wash anyway.

  When she at last began to speak, her voice was so faint, he had to strain to hear her.

  “Nobody knows, not even my father. My mother did… we both kept it from him. He respects Alphas, whereas Omegas are weak and only serve one useful purpose.” She swallowed and took a deep breath. “I don’t want that life. I love my career, my friends, my freedom. I was never submissive by nature. I couldn’t face the thought of belonging to a mate, of having to stop working and existing only to be a mother. It’s not me.”

  Evander took a moment to absorb the information. “Being an Omega is a huge honor. And it’s your duty to—”

  “What if I don’t want that?” she snarled, and he looked over to see her eyes flashing. “Fuck duty! Aren’t you listening to me?”

  He decided to try a different tack. “What is it you do again?”

  “Medical researcher.”

  Another piece of the puzzle clicked into place. “So you used suppressants.”

  She nodded. “All my free time was spent trying to improve the formula. It’s well-known that they’re not and were never intended for long-term use. But I figured I’d rather live a shorter, happy life, than…” Trailing off, she placed her forearm over her eyes.

  “What happened today?” Evander tried to keep his tone gentle and non-confrontational, even though his heart was pounding. After all this time, to finally find his mate and discover this about her… it was almost too much to bear. He could empathize with her up to a point, but this wasn’t how it was all supposed to go. He had always imagined finding his mate, taking her, claiming her, and siring children on her. She would be the loving, supportive, devoted, submissive partner he’d always dreamed of.

  Clara was anything but.

  “The meds must have stopped working. I need to get to the lab to try and find out why.” She turned to face him with what looked like a sudden onslaught of resolve. “Look, Evander, I like you. I always have. I forgive you for what happened—if anybody understands how powerful our hormones are, it’s me. But it’s not going to happen again. Ever. And I need you to promise never to tell anyone.”

  He was so stunned that for a moment, he didn’t know how to respond. “You can’t be serious.”

  “I’m extremely serious.”

  “No, you’re extremely mistaken. What you’re proposing is ridiculous. You can
’t deny your nature any more than I can. And you can’t pretend you didn’t feel it too, this connection we have. We were meant to be mates.”

  “So the concept of free will means nothing to you?” she retorted.

  “It is my will to have you as my mate.”

  “But it’s not mine!” With a huff, she flung herself back and once again covered her face with her arm.

  Evander got up off the bed. Her proximity was making it almost impossible to think clearly. He needed to put as much distance between them as he could while still carrying on their conversation.

  “If it’s because of the mating, it won’t always be so painful,” he said, pushing a stray lock of hair off his forehead. “It can actually feel better than anything else in the world.”

  She gave a little snort. “Even though I didn’t have one with you, that doesn’t mean I’m not aware of what an orgasm is.”

  Clenching his fists, he tried to tamp down the volcano of rage which was beginning to rise up within his chest. She was deliberately goading him, testing him, and the tiny portion of his mind which was still able to think rationally was aware of that. His emotions, on the other hand, were rapidly getting the better of him. “That was uncalled for,” he said between gritted teeth.

  “I’m done talking to you,” she said, getting up off the bed and smoothing down her rumpled dress. “I’d appreciate it if you’d keep this evening’s events to yourself. But if you can’t, I’ll just deny everything. I’m not some random, unknown little Omega you pulled off the streets—or out of that godawful Facility—and I won’t let you bully me. I have just as much power and clout here on the Hill as you do.”

  White spots danced in Evander’s field of vision. “You’re not leaving,” he said slowly. “I won’t let you.”

  That was when the infuriating little beauty made the mistake of approaching him. Putting her hands on her hips, she stood before him and glared up into his face. “Like I said, that’s not your decision to make.”